Celibacy

This past Easter, during Holy Week
I traveled to the Ukrainian city of Lviv
With a group of seminarians—
To celebrate Easter according to
the Ukrainian Catholic Rite.

At the boarder we were detained because one of our group
An Austrailian, lacked the required visas.

Eventually it was determined
that he would need to leave the country,
obtain the required visa,
and return, hopefully the next day.

I volunteered to stay with him, since I speak some Polish.

As we sat in a border police station, for a number of hours,
Waiting, basically, to be deported

I talked with two of the Ukrainian Border Guards,
Eventually the fact that I was studying
for the priesthood, came up.

What shocked them,
was not that I was studying for the priesthood,
but that I planned to live celibacy.

For these men, both of them faithful Ukrainian Catholics,
The thought of not having a wife
and family was beyond belief.

They asked me, didn’t I think it would be hard?

And I answered them honestly,
Of course it would be hard!!

I grew up thinking and planning to have a family
In fact I wanted a large family.
THAT WAS MY PLAN
But God had other, thoughts.

However, I pointed out to them,
That marriage also is hard.

As Jesus himself says,
“Not all can accept this word,
but only those to whom that is granted.”

The reaction of those two boarder guards
Was typical of the modern reaction to celibacy.

At the root of our problems with celibacy
Is a problem with marriage.

In Massachusetts this misunderstanding
is readily apparent—in so called “Gay Marriage.”
But also in divorce on demand
And in the numbers of people living out of wedlock

Our problem with understanding the Vocation to celibacy
is related to our problem understanding the vocation to marriage.
And in reality our understanding of true love.

People think that being married
is easier than being celebate
but I think that this is only because
they approach marriage as a means of self-fulfillment.

But, Marriage, is supposed to be about love
Its supposed to be about self-sacrifice and self-denial
And cooperation for the sake of the common good.

If marriage is truly about the gift of self,
then how can it be easy,
we are sinful people
and so to give ourselves totally to another
means to give everything day in and day out
even when we stop liking the other person
even when the fire is gone, when sexual attraction fades
and when sexual relations become impossible.

Marriage is about service TO THE OTHER,
TO YOUR SPOUSE BUT ALSO TO THE LARGER COMMUNITY
just like celibacy is about service

And its hard, those of you living, or trying to live,
Truly Christian marriages, know that marriage and family
Are a cross, are both a great blessing and also a heavy burden.

The modern mentality that questions celibacy,
In truth also questions chastity before marriage
And even the possibility of a Christian marriage

As men we are more than just our animal appetites
Food, water, shelter, procreation
Humanity needs all these things,
But humans also have reason,
we have the ability to transcend our basic animal needs
to seek and know the good, to know God.
We have Souls.

We are made by God, not just to meet our own needs
But also to serve each other, to love each other,
and to come to love God through this love of creation.

We are made to serve each other through natural society,
through: Marriage and Families,
And the towns, cities, and states that these create.

However, because we have souls,
Because we have free wills,
Throughout the history of salvation
We see examples of men living supernaturally
to serve each other through lives of work and prayer:
from Jeremiah to John the Baptist to St. Paul
these individuals lived as a sign of things to come.

These men and women lived in the now,
the celebate life of the future Heaven, they hope for,
where our only spouse will be Christ Jesus.

They did not see marriage as something evil,
No in fact as we read in St. Paul’s letter to the Ephesians
It is a great gift and sign of the Church—the ordinary means
for the sanctification of men, women, and children.

But just as husbands and wives grow in holiness
Learning to love and freely submit, to their spouse,

Those who live lives of celibacy, learn to love and to submit
In their relationships with the Church
and with their eternal spouse God

Jesus created his Church based on
The natural model of the family,

With spiritual fathers and mothers,
Who beget so many children not by sexual fecundity
But by grace, creating people anew in the love of God.

Just like marriage is not easy,
Celebacy is not easy, its not even natural,
but it is a central component of God’s plan for the world

Like, Peter and the twelve,
who were called to leave behind their old lives
including their wives and children
to preach the gospel and minister the mysteries of God,

likewise today priests and religious make this same sacrifice
god willing we make it willingly
without grudge or conditions.

In making this commitment to love
They fulfill their human vocation to give of oneself
To love and to be holy.

How do they do it?
Only by the grace of God.

The SAME GRACE THAT SUSTAINS CHRISTIAN MARRIAGES

It is true, we are weak creatures
Truly loving relationships are almost beyond us

But God gives us the strength to love the way He loved us
By giving His life for us.

The next time you hear some one speaking badly about celibacy
Please remember that what they are really attacking
is the possibility of true Love.

The type of love that is the Cross of Jesus Christ,
the center of our faith